Wednesday, March 24, 2010

That's no excuse

First off, I want to apologize deeply to anyone who may have (or may not have) heard that I said something to hurt them in any way.

Secondly in my small small small defense, I need you to know a little bit about me.

I am terrified of groups, and people in general.

I want you to like me so badly, that I've even been diagnosed with social anxiety and medicated on and off in my life for it.

When I was in preschool, I would come home crying and tell my mom that I had no friends.

Even if I did have people who liked me or occasionally played with me.

Sometimes, and some days I say things I don't mean, things that are too mean,
things that don't make sense
and things that are probably really hurtful.

I am not a perfect person, and I don't expect others to be.

Again I am very sorry if I ever said or did something that was contradictory to how I really felt or how things really are.

I have a hard time expressing myself, and sometimes when it comes out, it comes out wrong, or distorted by my own insecurities.

Just know please, that I am trying very hard for you to like me, and to know you better, and in that endeavor I say too much about me, or too much about you, or too much about too much. And I'm sorry. I truly am.

Also know that I am trying to be better and more sensitive to the plain fact that most people just want to be loved as they are and not changed into someone I can love more easily.

I do want to know you, I want to make you laugh and smile and feel happy when you are sad and happy just in general.
I like people a lot.

I like you.
I do.

But give me a chance.


Jon said...

(even though I'm assuming this is addressed to someone that I'm not) Don't stress out about it Jack, you've never offended or pissed me off.

Mikala and Travis said...

ley me just say, i think your amazing. not even joking. i was talking to brianna last night, and i was telling her how funny i thought you were and stuff. blah. how could anyone not like you?;)

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