Monday, January 18, 2010

Dear Brandon

okay, it's about time again (I keep sending letters to brandon but I seal them before I type them up (doiiiiighhh_dumb) ) so here is one finally- don't think I'm being cruel and never writing back to all these amazing letters blc writes (although I readily admit that his are so much more beautiful than mine) (maybe I just have to think that god's earth is greener beneath his feet because I love him like whoah but srsly) BUT I AM. proof:

[romantic, uplifting side]
Sometimes before I fall asleep at night your face appears in my mind and I am filled with the undescribable accumulation of all the thoughts I have to tell you throughout the day. These things begin penning themselves in a letter that only my dreams see- and when I wake up, the words fail and are replaced with a feeling that is a day old, and must develop again, anew.

If I could try to tell you what that feeling is it would take many words and I am sure a lifetime of love and adventures. But I can still try.

So that even with you on the other side of the world, you know that it is like

the idea of you entering a room, sends shivers into my heart and makes it wider, smile , and sometimes do spastic dances. It's the deep deep sweet.
It's the feeling of flight, the freedom to fall.
It's knowing nothing, but expecting hope and goodness.
It's the last bite of ice cream on the lid.

It's the stranger who stops to ask if you are okay.
It's your first valentine from someone who isn't your best friend, and then your first valentine from someone who is.

It's the honest nobility of a spare kindness, or care.
It's knowing you're here, even if you're there.

It's the sound of the ice cream truck.

It's the climb and the summit.
It's the motivation, the memory, the melody.

It's the word,
that endless word
it bends and beckons,
it reasons and expands simple views
into nature

in every grandeur
in every time.

It's like this
only a small increment
of the un- expressible
miracle of you.
and me.

[silly and slightly weird side...]

Some thoughtsicles:
I hope you didn't call me
today my phone is le dead.

We had sunday dinner at the cabin last night.
It's snowing again.
Today, I bundled the children into three layers each and drug (!?!) DRAGGED them (well, they sorta dragged me) out into the yard to make their first snowman,
the attempt (somewhat sullied by Boo's pee and poo ridden snow in the yard)
looks like this
pickles for eyes, carrot (classic) knows, herb branch for the smile, poop...

We had to do some reconstructive surgery to his/her face but he/she is happy near the back garden (this is an exact replica of the snowman, but may not be to size)


ps. the lump in my breast is hopefully a benign cyst or an infection, LOVE YOU!

Wyfuh (like wifii internet but EVERYWHERE)


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